Tag Archives: baby Rankin

Thankful

This week I had a pretty bad day, but luckily this is Thanksgiving week. I’m usually pretty good at the whole “being thankful” thing, but it’s pretty hard when bad things seem to happen one after another. The way I always get myself out of the funk that happens from feeling beaten down by life is by listing all the things for which I am grateful. 

As Thanksgiving approached this year, it seemed that I couldn’t catch a break: bad back spasms, a water-in-the-basement scare (which luckily was unfounded), and a flying rock that cracked my windshield as I was driving, just to name a few. I consciously took a step back in order to remind myself of all the amazing blessings I’m lucky enough to have in my life. 

I always start with the roof over my head. We went through a lot to be where we are today, including those oh-so-lovely 21 weeks (and one day) of living in the “hometel”. When I think about this home, I think about how lucky I am to have the perfect half to my whole…the guy who has stood by my side through it all, and who carried me when I was at my lowest. I think about our little family and the perfect (albeit simple) life we have made together. 

 

Home sweet home!

 

the family that makes our house a home .

The family that makes our house a home.

Then I think about my MS family. I couldn’t put together a better support system than this group. Just when people I thought were my friends had walked out of my life, the universe gave me them to fill the holes in my heart. To feel so completely understood and loved, despite all of my flaws and limitations, is comforting and, at the same time, liberating somehow.

The MS family

I think about my nephew, Lucas, who has taught me how to love even more deeply than ever before. While he isn’t officially a part of my bloodline, he has been a part of me since before he even got here, and I simply can’t get enough of him. He is pure love and there is no sweeter sound than his giggle, no better view than that smiling face. I’m thankful that because I am no longer working, I can be a constant in his life, not just some random relative that drifts in and out. 

My love, Lucas Scott.

My love, Lucas Scott.

I also think about how the fact that I am not working allows me time to work on me. I can now pay attention to my body and treat it well so that my MS behaves as much as possible. Of course I know that part is not always in my control, but by controlling the things I am capable of, I feel more empowered than ever. I owe so much of this to my trainer who always pushes me harder than I think I can manage, and who is WAY more than just my trainer. 

This woman has changed my life in so many ways and I love her to pieces.

This woman has changed my life in so many ways and I love her to pieces.

But mostly I’m truly thankful for little things that remind me how beautiful life is: the changing seasons, a great sunset, happily snoring puppies, or even a great, big hug. I could go on and on listing my blessings, but I’m sure you get the point. How could I possibly dwell on those few bad things once I started counting my blessings? Try it. You’ll see. 

Sleeping puppies.

Sleeping puppies.

A beautiful sunset.

A beautiful sunset.    

Changing seasons always lift me up!

Changing seasons always lift me up!

 

Luke

I have already written about how much I love my in-laws (http://www.makinglemonadebecauseican.com/in-laws/), but this week I am so overwhelmed with emotion that I need to revisit this topic. I have undoubtedly loved them from the day I met them, but my love for them has grown exponentially through the years. 

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Best brother ever.

My brother-in-law and I have always shared an incredibly special relationship. When I first met him, he was just a teenager, and I have been lucky enough to watch him grow into a sensitive and sweet, but also a tenacious and centered guy. To me, he is my actual brother, even though the bloodline says otherwise. I have shared in his triumphs as well as his challenges in the same way that all siblings support each other. He has always been there for me too, and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for him. I know for sure that he feels the same way. I have never questioned the strength of our sibling-hood, or our friendship for that matter. 

My husband and I love spending time with him and his (now) wife. All four of us bonded quickly, and see each other as often as we can. When he got married in June of 2014, I could not have been happier for him. My emotions on the day of his wedding were no different than on the day I watched my own sister get married. It was a special day, blending two very small families, and my husband wrote and officiated the ceremony. Many tears (of joy) were shed, and I was given a little sister of my very own.  

Me with my "little sister" and her mom, on the day of the wedding.

Me with my “little sister” and her mom, on the day of the wedding.

Soon after their honeymoon, my brother and sister-in-law announced that they were expecting a baby. I was over the moon with excitement. Often people misjudge how I feel about children because I have none of my own. I’ll spare you the details, but you can read more on my blog on this topic (http://www.makinglemonadebecauseican.com/?s=to+reproduce). Suffice it to say, that I love children, even though it was not a part of my plans. The best part about this baby is the growing of the Rankin family. I don’t have nieces or nephews that include me as a regular part of their lives, so this is the real deal. This isn’t the same as the many “nieces” and “nephews” I have, who are my friends’ children. I adore them all, but this is different. 

This was taken the day they told us that a baby was on the way!

This was taken the day they told us that a baby was on the way!

I have loved this baby since the first day I found out about him.  I started shopping for him immediately afterwards, and envisioning how he would change our lives. It would be impossible for him not to. He is the first of his generation in the Rankin family. 

It’s amazing how quickly our lives can change. One minute, we are going about our  business, wrapped up in the routine of every day life, and the next minute, life as we know it is transformed and priorities shift. We got the call that the baby was coming early, and off we went. My brother and sister-in-law went to the hospital as a newlywed couple, and within hours, they were a family of three. All of a sudden, they are parents: a mommy and a daddy. I have always been fascinated by that!   

This is where we sat waiting for news of Luke's arrival.

This is where we sat waiting for news of Luke’s arrival.

Just when I thought I couldn’t love my in-laws any more, I sat in the family waiting room, feeling the anticipation grow, and I swear my heart swelled with even more love than I thought possible. I sat on the edge of my seat, all of us jumping up at the sound of any footsteps coming with news. First came the baby, surrounded by nurses. We asked if it was “ours” and at that moment we learned that the newest Rankin is a boy. I swore the whole time that it was a girl, but apparently women who marry Rankin men only make boys! But most important of all is that he is here and he is already loved by so many. 

When my brother-in-law finally came out to talk to us, I saw him in a whole different light. When I watched him talk about his wife and his son, he beamed with pride. Then I watched my mother-in-law watching him, also beaming with pride. At that moment, the family connection felt so incredibly genuine. Between all of us.  

Lucas Scott Rankin came into this world on March 23. 2015, on my mother-in-law’s 70th birthday. What a gift she got! Her first grandchild. But he’s my nephew! I can’t wait to get to know this little man, and to be actively involved in his life. I can’t wait to spoil him rotten and be the “cool” aunt. I can’t wait to hug him and kiss him, and to witness his milestones. I vow to love him unconditionally and forever, because we are family. Luke, weighing in at a whopping 4 lbs., 2 oz., has already made an impact on me. He has made me love my family even more than I already did before he got here. Thank you, sweet Luke. 

My bro holding his son's hand. It doesn't get more beautiful.

My bro holding his son’s hand. It doesn’t get more beautiful.

“In-laws”

I never quite understood the image of “the mother-in-law” portrayed so frequently as a beast, or the in-laws (in general) from hell. When I first met the Rankins (over 20 years ago!), there was an instant connection. My mother-in-law (Mama B.) opened her heart to me in ways I could never even begin to describe. She filled a definite void for me, and I truly have become the daughter she never had. I’m the youngest of 3 girls, and at age 22, I finally got the little brother I had always wished for.  

Me and my bro on one of our many outings together

Me and my bro on one of our many outings together

My Mama B. has been there for me on so many occasions. When I was first home on sick leave from school, she came to take me out for lunch, bringing meals she had cooked to stock our freezer. She was with me when my neurologist wrote me out of work for 6 months. She was with me when I told my principal that I’d be out for 6 months. She was with me when I had to see the state appointed physician for SSDI. She was with me when I met with the NJEA consultant to discuss disability retirement. She then helped me complete all the necessary steps because she knew I needed her support. When I needed to see an independent medical examiner in order to receive my pension, my Mama B. was right by my side. There has never been a time, in 20 years, that she answered “no” to anything at all. Our relationship is like a mother/daughter relationship, but better! There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her, including cleaning out her underwear drawer after she dies (seriously this job has been assigned to me!).

Me and my fabulous Mama B.!

Me and my fabulous Mama B.!

My brother-in-law has always been my brother. We have never used the “in-law” part of the title. Some of my favorite memories are of times just the two of us spent together. Whether we went out for a mini bar crawl in the middle of a summer day, or hung out watching TV, I have always loved spending time with my bro. You can imagine how excited I was when he gave me a little sister by marrying a pretty awesome girl. Yada yada yada….a new little Rankin is on the way!

Me and Bruce with my bro, Scott, and the newest Mrs. Rankin, Dana.

Me and Bruce with my bro, Scott, and the newest Mrs. Rankin, Dana.

Often people assume that just because I do not have children I must hate them. Feel free to browse the blog entry I wrote “to reproduce or not to reproduce” for a longer explanation of how I feel, but suffice it to say that this could not be further from the truth. I don’t think anyone is more excited about the upcoming addition to the family than I am. I can’t wait to meet my little niece or nephew. I have plenty of “nieces” and “nephews” (my friends’ children), but none of my own. I can’t wait to be a part of this child’s life from the very beginning. I can’t wait to witness the milestones as s(h)e grows up. I can’t wait to be the cool aunt and spoil her/him rotten.  

I love these Rankin men.

I love these Rankin men.

On multiple occasions in my life, I have felt very strongly that I was taken care of by, let’s just say, the universe. I could name the times, but they wouldn’t have meaning to you. I’m looking at the events of the past year, and realizing just how everything has come together. My Mama B. retired just in time to help me with everything I needed in order to make this huge change in my life.  Now I’m not working, so I can enjoy as much time with little baby Rankin when s(h)e gets here! But it’s about way  more than the quantity of time I’ll get to spend. It’s true that I had to retire early with a disability, but the unexpected gift of learning to be present in every single moment spent with loved ones, is something I would not have been given otherwise. I’m so lucky I learned in time to welcome the wee one because my heart is just waiting for her/his grand entrance! 

This is a Rankin family selfie (including Miles, Scott's dog), taken after celebrating Dana's baby shower.

This is a Rankin family selfie (including Miles, Scott’s dog), taken after celebrating Dana’s baby shower.